


Valentine's Day

by Nicole Premier (MistressArachnia)



Category: Togainu no Chi
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Ass Play, Biting, Domestic, Fanart, Fluff, Frottage, Illustrated, Kissing, Kittens, Light Angst, Light Bondage, Living Together, M/M, Oral Sex, Past Child Abuse, Past Sexual Abuse, Post-Canon, Rimming, Romance, Sex Toys, Smut, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-03-01
Packaged: 2019-11-05 18:10:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 17,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17923793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MistressArachnia/pseuds/Nicole%20Premier
Summary: Everyone around them is caught up in the spirit of Valentine's Day, but neither Nano nor Akira are familiar with it. Hand in hand, they decide to explore this holiday's customs together.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a little late for Valentine's Day... but hey, I made it just in time for Togainu no Chi's 14th Anniversary! That counts for something, right???
> 
> This fic wound up much longer than intended. What started as a cute, silly one-shot idea, gradually ran away from me and developed a life of it's own. The story is set several years post Nano's route and follows in the same timeline as my previous fic that I wrote for Nano's birthday, Celebration of Life. Since Nano and Akira have been living together for years, their relationship has become a bit more mature and they've settled into a comfortable routine together. Our beloved refugees have been granted a moment's peace from their life on the run. Although they have no way of knowing when it might end, for now they're content to rest and build up a small semblance of normalcy.
> 
> As with all of my post-canon Nano fics, Akira typically refers to his lover by his Russian name, Nikolai, but I still refer to him as Nano throughout the text. Nano is still fairly naive and eccentric on account of having spent most of his life as a test subject, but since he has had more social interaction with Akira his manner of speaking has become much more straightforward and direct (sometimes a little too direct) and he has become much more emotionally expressive.
> 
> Divided into two parts for length. This first chapter is pretty fluffy. Things get smutty in chapter 2, so if that's what you're here for... skip the fluff and head straight to the next chapter. I won't tell. >:)

It was a cold, snowy day in February.

The Black Cat Book Cafe, a small independent bookstore where Nano had been working for the past four months, was drawing a lot more business than usual. He supposed that was good for his continued employment prospects, but as the shop’s only employee, it also meant that he hadn’t had much downtime. Most days the store was largely empty, and he was not only permitted, but encouraged, to read whatever he liked. He had grown to love the old plush purple rocking chair with the crochet lace blanket by the fireplace. He loved to sit there with a cat on his lap and a cup of tea in his hand as snowflakes enveloped the shop in a sea of misty white. Any day he could lose himself in the pages of a good novel was bliss. Theoretically, his boss felt that reading would help familiarize him with the merchandise so that he could better assist potential customers in choosing their selections. However, in practice it was rare that anyone asked his opinion. Most of the time customers simply browsed quietly until they found something that interested them, then brought it to the counter for him to ring up.

It was a peaceful job in a quiet courtyard away from the main street, and Nano was deeply grateful for having been hired there. His boss, Edith, was a soft-spoken elderly woman with seven cats whose husband had recently passed away. Akira had introduced them after she hired him to do some handiwork, and she had taken a liking to Nano immediately. Edith lived upstairs from the shop, and sometimes came down with tea and cookies, though she mostly kept to herself. Her cats were quite friendly, and often wandered down to visit with Nano and the customers. He had gotten to know them all quite well over the past four months.

Best of all, the bookshop was on the same block as the cafe where Akira was employed, so the two of them could commute to and from work together.

“Mew! Mew! Mew!”

Today, however, Nano barely had time to sit down, and that made things difficult for both him and the tiny three week old baby kitten that he was currently attempting to bottle feed.

As soon as he finished ringing up his customer’s order, Nano picked up the fussing kitten from her box, wrapping her in a towel as he tried to get her warm and settled on his lap for her afternoon meal. Sharp claws scraped against the faded fabric of the old towel as Nano stroked her fur gently, admiring the mixture of seemingly antithetical colors. Edith had called her a calico cat, and apparently all calico cats were female. The pretty little kitten stared up at him with blue eyes, one of which was beginning to change to a greenish yellow hue. She continued to meow pathetically as Nano tested the formula to make sure it was the right temperature.

Cordelia and Beatrice, two of Edith’s cats, seated themselves curiously at his feet, watching in silent judgement to see whether a human could indeed successfully feed an infant kitten. No matter how many times they had seen him do it, they did not appear convinced.

“Excuse me, but can you tell me where the romance section is?”

A young woman dressed entirely in shades of pale pink and purple with a silver pentagram necklace was standing at the checkout counter, twirling her hair between her fingers nervously, afraid to meet his gaze.

“…Just a moment.”

It usually didn’t take his little kitten long to start eating, but she was being particularly troublesome today, probably because her new father hadn’t had much time to hold her. Nursing a newborn kitten wasn’t particularly difficult once you knew how to do it, but she had to be fed regularly around the clock every few hours, regardless of his work or sleep schedule. It was fortunate that his boss understood the problem and was fully supportive of Nano bringing his baby to work.

Once the little kitten finally latched onto the bottle, Nano gestured towards the back wall.

“The romance section is towards the back on the left, after mystery. It is the second from the last row.”

All of this still felt a bit surreal, dreamlike. It was like waking from a strange nightmare that he thought would never end. Who would have thought that one day Nicole Premier would have a job, a boss, a home, a growing family?

Of course, no one called him that anymore. No one knew a thing about his past, and given how many had been hurt during the war, people knew better than to ask. Here he was just Nikolai, a quiet, eccentric Russian with dyed black curls and captivating blue eyes who had recently immigrated to this little town in Canada with his stoic Japanese lover. People didn’t quite know what to make of him, but no one trembled with fear to look upon him any longer. No one came to him seeking the cursed blood that running through his veins. The townspeople here looked directly into his eyes, spoke to him as though he were human.

Running from place to place, afraid of everyone, wary of their pursuers, always on the move without a moment’s rest… he had thought that life would be all that he and Akira had to look forward to, as long or brief as it might be. And to tell the truth, he wouldn’t have asked for it to be any other way. For the first time in his life, he was beginning to understand what it meant to be alive. And it was all because of Akira.

But for the past eight months, they had not had to run. It was by far the longest the two of them had ever stayed in one place. Of course, there was no telling when their pursuers would catch up to them. It might be tonight, it might be three years from now. It was impossible to know.

But for the time being… they could rest.

The little kitten pawed at the towel Nano had wrapped around her, kneading it with her tiny claws as she drank.

“She’s so sweet! I have two calico girls back home, both rescues. Happy Valentine's Day to both of you!”

Nano glanced up and smiled softly at the older woman currently passing by the counter with a stack of books in her arms.

So many people who came into the shop professed to love cats that one might assume the feeling was universal. Yet Nano and Akira had discovered their new baby abandoned under a blanket in a cardboard box marked ‘free’ by their apartment dumpster, thrown out like rubbish. She was the only one left behind, so cold they could barely hear her tiny meows over the surrounding traffic. If Akira hadn’t checked the box impulsively to see if it contained anything useful, that little light would have flickered and burnt out before anyone ever felt its glow. But, at the last moment as her life was beginning to fade, fate had spared her.

They brought the kitten inside right away and tried to warm her up by the fireplace. She was barely moving. Her eyes were closed tight, her tiny ears flat against her head. She couldn’t have been more than a week old, far too young to have been separated from her mother. Nano doubted that she would live through the night, but Akira was determined to prove him wrong. So Nano closed his eyes, praying silently to whoever would listen for the little cat to live.

Akira kept asking, “What is wrong with people?! Who would do such a thing?!” He hit his fists against the wall, furious with all of humanity, trying to hold back his tears as he demanded answers from the universe that would never be given. Nano wished he could be as shocked as Akira, but he had already seen more than enough of human nature to know full well the monstrous horrors that their brethren were capable of. Humans were selfish to the core, and unwanted kittens a burdensome inconvenience for which most held little empathy.

Was it really so different than what had been done to him and Akira? Orphan children, like unwanted kittens, were so very weak. Torn from their families, but unable to survive on their own, their lives were a burdensome responsibility no one wanted. Live or die, no one cared about their dark fate. They were disposable. And so people looked the other way as their lives were crushed.

Perhaps that was why Akira cared so deeply.

Nano held the tiny frozen body by the fireplace while Akira went out in the snow again to buy a bottle and some kitten formula. The poor thing was anemic and covered in fleas. He tried his best to comb through her calico fur with a flea brush to keep the insects from draining what little was left of her blood. It might have been a more tedious task, were it not for the peculiar fact that given his proximity the insects were drawn to Nano’s flesh like a magnet, away from the kitten, greedy for the poison that ran through his veins. That temptation proved to be their doom. Soon, the blood-sucking vermin all lay dead. Nano wiped the little kitten down with a damp paper towel to clean off the blood and dirt from her fur.

Yume, their grey tabby cat, was quite curious about his new little sister, following Nano around the house as he looked for supplies to clean and groom her. Once Akira had returned and the little cat was warm, she was quite hungry. They set up a little box with some towels and a heating pad, and took turns through the night waking up to feed her. When they awoke in the morning to check on their new baby, they found that Yume had curled up alongside her, licking her colorful fur lovingly. Even he seemed to have already accepted her into the family.

They named her Negai, meaning 'prayer' or ‘wish’ in Japanese.

That fragile little life grew stronger each day. Negai still slept most of the time, but she had opened her eyes and was slowly starting to explore her environment and newfound family.

And now, resting contentedly in Nano’s lap, she had finally ceased her fussing, closing her eyes and seeming almost to fall asleep while she suckled on her bottle. Finally she finished and began to purr softly, a gentle vibration that nonetheless radiated through his soul.

“What a precious baby! Is she your Valentine? I used to have a cat that looked just like her when I was a girl.”

Nano closed his eyes. It seemed, all too soon, that it was time to return to work. He set his kitten gently down on a blanket, careful not to wake her.  
  
But when Nano stood up, pure ice coursed through his veins and the peaceful mood was instantly shattered.

Two women were standing at the counter of the small bookstore with their purchases in hand watching him like hawks. His heart nearly stopped, the four walls closing in too tight around him. On the surface, there was nothing particularly unusual about the interaction, yet Nano found himself frozen, unable to reply.

He was looking at a ghost.

No. This could not be. It was impossible. He was seeing things.

Emma…?

The woman speaking bore an uncanny resemblance to his former lover, at least in her younger days as he remembered her from ENED. Shoulder length brown hair, green eyes, red lipstick, red coat, tight low cut shirt.

…Impossible. He must be going mad.

His mind reeled, a deep chill winding through his veins. Of course it couldn’t _really_ be her, he _knew_ it couldn’t. He watched Emma die. Soaked his hands in her blood. But even so it felt as though he were facing a specter come back to haunt him from the dark dripping walls of his memories. A familiar face who still visited him in his nightmares.

Nano’s heart rate accelerated involuntarily, though he wasn’t sure he could accurately identify the emotion he felt. It was too intense for stress or discomfort. Agitation, maybe? Shock? Fear?

…Guilt?

The woman smirked almost menacingly, narrowing her jade green eyes. Even her expressions were eerily familiar.

“See something you like?”

Nano’s deep blue eyes trailed back up the woman’s blouse to her face, unaware that they had been lingering on the same spot where he had once thrust his hand through his former lover’s chest.

Dizziness swamped his body. Wordlessly, Nano reached out for the books she was carrying to ring them up on the cash register.

“Aww, he’s shy,” the other girl cooed.

Shy… Such a quaint word. It didn’t feel right, though. What was it that shyness was supposed to make one do? He couldn’t remember.

“Relax. We don’t bite… hard. At least not on the first date. Unless, of course… you're into that.”

Nano’s lips parted when he felt the woman’s fingertips and long nails brush against his cheek, but no words came. Her touch was cold, fragile, but deliberate… different than the warm caress of Akira. He tore his eyes back to the cash register.

The second woman only superficially resembled the first and did not invoke the same disquieting dread. She had red hair and pale skin with freckles, and was wearing a similarly loud shade of crimson. Come to think of it, most of the women who had come into the shop today had been wearing shades of red and pink. Curious. Was it part of some Canadian custom he was unaware of?

“Hey, he’s not wearing a ring.”

Nano blinked. Was he _supposed_ to be wearing one? Was it part of the ritual here? He didn’t even own a ring. The only jewelry he ever wore was a small silver locket Akira had given him for his birthday.

“Yeah, but he’s cute. The cute ones are _always_ taken. Hey, honey... do you have a girlfriend you’re going home to after work?”

Nano shook his head silently, trying to keep his focus on totaling up their joint purchases. Interestingly, the color red hadn’t been the only thing the customers today had in common. They all seemed to be shopping for more or less the same thing. Steamy romance novels with half-dressed men on the cover, manuals about medieval dungeons featuring men and women bound in strange torture devices, and some ancient Hindu text he’d never heard of… ah yes, the ‘Kama Sutra,’ whatever that was. These women were buying a copy, too. It was a perplexing combination. He wondered what these particular books had in common.

“Oho…? Is that so…? We’ll have to fix that for you. It’s awful being alone on Valentine’s Day, isn’t it?”

Valentine’s Day…? It must be some sort of Canadian holiday. That made sense. People often purchased the same sorts of books around holidays. Christmas was all reindeer, angels, and fat men in red suits.

It was curious that Akira hadn’t mentioned anything to him about it. However, holidays seemed to vary from country to country, and since Akira was Japanese, perhaps he didn’t know much about it, either.

“Your total comes to $34.69.”

Nano waited for one of the women to hand him a credit card, but instead their eyes continued to trail up and down his body almost as though they were sizing him up for their next meal. He stared back expressionlessly, meeting their gaze as he struggled to push back the ghosts from his memories to make sense of their odd behavior.

“So you _do_ speak! You looked so lost in your own world that I was beginning to wonder. If you’re not doing anything tonight, care to come back to our place and share a drink with two lonely single ladies?”

Why on earth would he… Ah. Nano felt his skin flush as the realization hit him. The pieces were beginning to fall into place. It seemed all of the red they were wearing was not purely coincidence.

Finally, one of the women handed him a credit card.

On some level, he had to admit that such attention was quite… flattering? Was that the right word? He still wasn’t used to being wanted by anyone for anything other than his blood. It felt strange to be desired instead for his body.

However… the only person he wanted to go home with that night was Akira.

“…That is impossible.”

“Oh? Why’s that? Working late?”

“My heart has been dyed by another. Its color cannot change.”

“Hmm, how poetic. But just a moment ago you said you didn’t have a girlfriend…”

“I do not.”

“Oh I see… we’re just not your type, hmm? Or do you not approve of our taste in literature?”

Nano blinked. He hadn’t read any of the books she was purchasing, so it was challenging to form an opinion either way regarding her taste in literature.

Unsure how to reply, Nano picked up one of the medieval torture manuals she was waving in front of him and turned it over to read the back cover. “How to bring out your inner goddess to dominate any man in the bedroom until you have him dripping with desire, begging on his knees…”

His lips parted wordlessly. This certainly conjured up some interesting mental imagery.

“Oh my gosh, he’s blushing! That’s so cute and innocent. And I swear his eyes flashed purple.”

“I think that means he likes it. Why don’t you get us some tea, honey? Black, with cream. No sugar.”

Lost in thought, Nano handed the erotic torture book politely back to its new owner and headed over to the refreshment table to brew two cups of tea.

“…You were right. He’s _very_ submissive.”

“Or very dedicated to his job.”

“Aren’t they the same? Either way, someone must have trained him well.”

Before Nano could dig himself in any deeper, the bell on the shop door rung, drawing his attention for the briefest of seconds as he glanced up to check who was coming or going. His eyes softened when he saw Akira standing in the doorway, breathless, brushing off the snow from his heavy overcoat and carrying what appeared to be a pink shopping bag and approximately a dozen multicolored cut roses tied together with a red ribbon.

“There it is again! I swear his eyes changed colors.”

“I think it’s just a play of the light, but he really does have the most gorgeous eyes. It would be a shame to blindfold him.”

“…Oh, but he’d look _so good_ in red silk…”

Ignoring the other customers, Akira marched straight up to the counter just as Nano returned with the requested tea for the two women, eyeing them suspiciously as they lingered about the counter.

“When do you get off work, honey?”

“Six.” Nano answered, almost mechanically.

“Mmm… that’s fine. We have a few errands to run. And you’re _quite_ sure you don’t have a sweet little girlfriend back home waiting to play with you tonight?”

“ _Play…_? Nikolai, what’s…” Akira’s eyes widened, glancing back to Nano with a look of concern. Nano’s lips curved into a soft smile and his cheeks flushed with warmth at the sound of his name on his lover’s lips.

“…I do not have a girlfriend. I have Akira.”

“…Is that your cat’s name?”

His lips parted, but before Nano could reply, Akira took over, eyes narrowing as he turned to face the women directly.

“No, _I’m_ Akira.”

Without further ceremony, Akira thrust a bundle of freshly cut roses tied together with a red silk ribbon at Nano.

“The woman I’ve been working for on my days off this past week had a whole garden of them. You know, the one who owns the candle shop down the street. She asked if I’d bought any flowers for my lover for Valentine’s Day yet, and when I said no, she insisted I take these. So here. They’re for you.”

Nano blinked, accepting the flowers from Akira’s outstretched hand. Akira sighed, gesturing towards the pink bag.

“She gave me a bunch of other stuff that I guess you’re supposed to have for this holiday, too, but to be honest I’m not even sure what half of it is.”

Both women were staring incredulously at Akira, jaws dropped as they watched the interaction. They shot one another a knowing look, then both burst out into laughter simultaneously.

“Oh _no_! I get it now! I’m _so_ sorry, we didn’t realize you had a _boy_ friend! You should have said so! _Now_ it makes sense. I guess we should’ve known - no straight man would work in a bookstore full of cats, tea, Wiccan decor, and erotica, much less blow off a room full of desperate women to dote on a kitten.”

“It’s true… all the good ones in this town are either taken or gay. It sucks being a heterosexual woman in this day and age.”

“But… never mind. You two are cute together. Have fun tonight. We’re _so_ sorry. I hope you both have a nice Valentine’s Day!”

Akira stared blankly after them as he watched the women leave the shop.

“What was _that_ about?”

“I suspect this Canadian holiday involves some kind of mating ritual.”

“…You’re not exactly wrong. It’s Valentine’s Day.”

“Is this the feast day of the beheaded martyr, St. Valentine?” That might explain the rise in sales of torture manuals.

“Um… I have no idea. I don’t know anything about that sort of thing. In Japan, Valentine’s Day is just a day where women buy chocolate for men. Then the next month is White Day, where men buy three times as much chocolate for all of the women who gave them chocolate on Valentine’s Day. It’s basically just a ploy for the chocolate companies to sell as much as possible.”

Nano blinked.

“…Those women who asked me to come back to their place simply wished to give me chocolate?”

That was one thought that definitely _hadn’t_ crossed his mind.

“ _Those_ two? I doubt it. They seem to do things a little differently in Canada. I swear, the brunette looked almost like…” Akira paused, backtracking. “Wait… they asked you back to their place? _Both_ of them?”

“I declined.”

“Tsk… I can’t leave you alone for a minute. But I guess I don’t blame them for trying. You _are_ very handsome, especially when you smile.”

Akira leaned over the counter, tucking a stray strand of black hair behind Nano’s ear. The brush of his lover’s fingertips sent a tingling shock down the nape of his neck as their opposite blood reacted.

“You’ve come so far from when we first met. It’s hard to believe you’re the same person, sometimes.”

Nano traced his fingertips along the stems of the roses. As lovely as they were, they were still covered by thorns, their bloodthirsty nature only superficially masked by beauty. Would those women still desire him, he wondered, if they knew that when he looked at them he had been picturing his former lover dead on the ground in a pool of her own blood?

“I wonder sometimes… if I am deceiving them all.”

“No. You aren’t. You can’t think that way.”

A soft smile flickered across his lips. He knew that Akira would never abandon him, even knowing what deadly thorns lurked among the blossoms. Akira leaned closer, whispering into his ear so softly that it almost tickled.

“Nicole Premier was who the world _forced_ you to be. It wasn’t who you truly were. When you were finally free to choose, to pursue your own dreams and become who you wish, _that_ is when your true colors could finally shine through.”

Soft lips brushed against Nano’s skin, and he almost wanted to purr.

“ _This_ is who you are. Nothing else matters.”

“…It is all because of you, Akira.”

In response, Akira’s skin blushed a beautiful shade of pink, but his smile didn’t fade. How he loved that smile, though he loved even more to think that he was the cause of it. Nano leaned in, kissing him softly on his forehead. His eyes trailed down to the bouquet of roses in his hands. They smelled divine.

“What shall I do with these flowers, Akira?”

“Um… I’m not sure.” Akira shrugged. “I know roses are supposed to be romantic, but what do people usually do with flowers? Put them in a vase? Look at them? I don’t know. Just try not to prick your fingers on the thorns.”

“Alright…” Nano traced his fingertips along the soft petals.

“…Can I eat them?”

Akira blinked.

“…I guess if you want? I don’t think anything bad will happen to you if you eat them. I’m not sure how good they’ll taste, though.”

Nano plucked a few pink petals. Their delicate flavor was light and subtle in comparison to their overpowering aroma. It was soothing. Romantic.

“Thank you, Akira. They are delicious.”

Akira watched him with a slight smile, laughing softly under his breath.

“…You’re welcome. How’s our little girl doing?”

Akira bent down to peer inside the box at the sleepy purring kitten as Nano continued to idly munch on rose petals.

“Her light shines brighter every day. When I look into her eyes, it is my own reflection I see. Mine… and yours.”

Akira sighed, stroking the little kitten’s soft fur as she nuzzled her tiny head against his palm.

“I wish I could bring her to the cafe with me, but I’m always on my feet, and I’m sure it would cause all sorts of health code violations.”

“I don’t mind, Akira.”

Akira settled back behind the counter beside his beloved little kitten. The moment he sat down, Cordelia and Beatrice, the two cats who had been eyeing him with great suspicion earlier as he fed the kitten, immediately came over to rub against Akira’s legs and climb onto his lap. They were the most outgoing of the seven. Cordelia was a long haired white cat, and Beatrice was what Edith referred to as a Siamese. Wilfred, the black cat for whom the shop was originally named, was usually asleep in the front window. His sister Gertrude was also black with longer fur, and liked to sleep by the fire. He didn’t see the other three - they were probably upstairs with Edith. Akira smiled happily as he greeted them.

“Um… excuse me… I’m looking for a particular title for my girlfriend, and I’m not sure where to look…”

Nano still had a rose petal between his lips when he glanced back to see a young woman with short hair and glasses waiting politely at the counter. He quickly handed the bouquet back to Akira and went to assist her. Work, it seemed, was not over yet.

“…Who is the author?”

* * *

Finally the workday was almost finished. After the last of the customers cleared out, Nano set to rearranging books on the display stands, putting away the empty cookie tray, replacing tea bags, and making sure the owner’s cats each had food and water. Finally, he was ready to leave.

“I still can’t believe I’m waiting for _you_ to get off work now instead of the other way around. I’m proud of you. This job suits you well.”

Akira picked up his kitten carefully, tucking her snugly against his warm chest. He zipped up his overcoat partway to keep her warm and cozy. Her little face peered out to watch them from above his zipper.

“Ready?”

Akira reached out for Nano’s gloved hand, wrapping his scarf tighter around his neck as the three of them stepped out into the snow to make their journey home. As soon as the cold air hit, Negai immediately huddled down into the warmth of Akira’s coat. Although it was only just after 6pm, the sun had already set, and the frozen white wonderland that spread out in every direction was illuminated by streetlights.

“Let’s stop by the cafe on the way to the bus stop. We have chocolate candies for sale up front. Since everyone keeps reminding me that it’s Valentine’s Day, I feel like I should get you something a little tastier than roses to celebrate.”

“The roses are delicious, Akira.”

“………”

“……?”

“…I think they may have some rose chocolates for sale. Let’s check.”

“I would like to buy some for you, too, Akira. I want to share them with you.”

It was a simple thing, but it felt good to be able to say those words. For years before he was hired at the Black Cat Book Cafe, Nano had been unable to hold a steady job. Sometimes he had succeeded in finding transient work, though he was frequently rejected outright for things like manual labor or security based solely on his slender, fragile appearance. Alas, he had no other skills. Prospective employers didn’t believe he could lift as much as the manual labor jobs entailed, and he was told over and over that his presence wasn’t intimidating enough for security work.

“Not intimidating enough.” Words he never thought he would hear. Such irony… he could imagine Shiki rolling in his grave. If only they knew how truly terrifying he could be.

But Nano couldn’t speak a word as to his true abilities, lest the refugees give themselves away. Alas, on the nights he remained silent, they often went hungry.

Akira gave Nano’s hand a tight squeeze before opening the door to the cafe. Like the bookstore earlier, the cafe was uncharacteristically crowded. The lights had been dimmed, tables awash with candlelight, and all of the booths appeared to have been taken over by couples out to celebrate the holiday.

“Wow… It wasn’t this crowded at lunch. I guess I’m glad I don’t work the dinner shift. Though I suppose the waiters should make good tips tonight.”

Catching sight of one of his coworkers, Akira tried to wave him over as he lead Nano over to the bakery counter.

“Mew!”

“Shush. You’re not supposed to be in here,” Akira scolded the kitten peeking out from his coat. He pulled his zipper higher in an attempt to keep her presence concealed.

“The wait time is about 30 minutes if you don’t have a reservation… Oh! Akira! I’m sorry, I thought you went home for the evening. What can I do for you?”

“We just wanted to buy a few chocolates. Do you know what you want yet, Nikolai?”

“I’m trying to decide between the maple and the rose chocolates. Which do you prefer, Akira?”

“I’m not sure. I haven’t ever tried the rose ones. Let’s get three of each. And three of the peanut butter, as well.”

Nano smiled. Of course Akira chose the peanut butter chocolates. That was what he always picked, even after one of his coworkers had teased him over the fact that they were children’s candies. It was fitting, since Akira often preferred to order off the children’s menu. Still, he could just imagine the glare he must have shot him.

Fortunately, this man didn’t seem to take any issue with Akira’s choice of chocolates.

“Alright, I’ll put them in a box for you. With your employee discount, the total comes to $9.35.”

“…I’ll pay for them, Akira.”

Nano felt a surge of warmth as he counted out the change, money he had earned himself, watching with curiosity as the young man placed the chocolates in a small pink box tied with a red ribbon.

So much pink and red on this holiday. Passion, muted passion… for what else was romance? Even without an explanation, he felt that he was starting to understand this day.

“Thank you two for stopping by. Happy Valentine’s Day!”

Nano and Akira waved their goodbyes and headed back out into the snow. As soon as they closed the door, Akira breathed a sigh of relief that no one had noticed the kitten hiding in his thick coat. They made it to the bus stop just in time to catch the next bus.

“Everywhere is so crowded today. I guess everyone is taking their dates out for dinner. It’s too bad - I would have been tempted to order takeout, but the wait is probably horrible… so I suppose I’ll have to make dinner at home.”

“I can make dinner tonight, Akira.”

Akira shot him an amused smirk.

“I’m almost afraid to ask what you’d make. You’ve only barely mastered heating up canned soup.”

“But…” Nano frowned, picking off another rose petal. “You like soup, don’t you, Akira? Especially when it’s snowing. I was thinking that alphabet soup you love would pair well with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches tonight.”

“Heh…” Akira smiled, leaning in to give him a brief peck on the cheek. “Sure, that’s romantic enough. You heat up the soup and I’ll make the sandwiches.”

The pair settled into a comfortable silence as the bus began to move. When the weather was warmer, they usually walked to and from work together. Alas, as beautiful as the landscape was, in the dead of winter when temperatures regularly dropped below zero, staying out in the snow too long was miserable. Especially with a tiny kitten in tow who couldn’t yet regulate her own body temperature, public transportation was a necessity.

Nano continued to munch idly on rose petals as he gazed out the windows at the lights illuminating the shops and restaurants, reflecting brightly off the snow. Everywhere he looked, couples were hurrying hand in hand towards their destinations. Silently, he reached out for Akira’s hand beside him.

It had always been just him and Akira, alone against the world, running from the path fate had laid before them to carve out their own destiny. Alas, every time they thought they had earned a moment’s respite, their pursuers were hot on their tails. Usually they took transient jobs, whatever they could get to earn enough money to pay for a roof over their heads, never staying long enough to get to know anyone or earn any sort of reputation around town, forever on the run. They were always only just scraping by, and there were many nights they had gone hungry. Canned soup and sandwiches were a luxury they often could not afford.

A slight movement inside Akira’s winter coat brought a wistful smile to his lips. He worried, sometimes, that in this moment’s rest, the two of them had become too soft. After all, there was nothing stopping the men who hunted them from showing up at their doorstep that very night… and if they did, would they really be able to simply drop the lives they had built and vanish into the night as they had before?

Finally they arrived at their stop, making their way up the slippery apartment steps to their front door. Akira cursed as he struggled to find his keys, but Nano had his out already, and before Akira could get too indignant about it, the door was open and they were trying their best not to trip over the grey ball of fluff that wove between their legs when they entered.

“Ahhh… finally.” Akira slipped off his boots and heavy overcoat. “Why don’t you get a fire started and I’ll warm up Negai’s formula in the microwave?”

Warmth. Another indulgence Nano would never take for granted.

Soon a fire was blazing on the hearth and both cats were fed and sound asleep curled up together in a cardboard box. The once drafty little apartment was a lot warmer now that Akira had resealed the windows. Still, the apartment often got cold on the darkest nights, even with a fire going and the bed piled high with mismatched old quilts. Nano didn’t mind, though, so long as he could hold his lover’s warm body through the night.

“Just think, in a couple weeks, Negai will be eating solid food, and we won’t have to get up in the middle of the night to feed her,” Akira mused as he shifted through their sparse pantry for the peanut butter and jelly. There was only a bit left in each jar, but it should be enough for tonight.

Nano found a can opener and set about to carefully positioning it on top of the soup can the way Akira had shown him.

“Sometimes I wonder… what would we do, if our pursuers caught up with us now? What would become of this little flame of life that we two have cultivated together?”

“I think about that, too…” Akira sighed, “And I wish we didn’t have to think that way. I suppose we’d probably have to drop her off with Edith and hope for the best. She would be alright. Everyone loves her at the shop. There’s no way they would abandon her, even if her father left in the middle of the night without a word. And Yume is tougher than he pretends to be - he could probably handle the road. But I hope we don’t have to worry about that for at least a couple of weeks. It’s been nearly eight months since we last saw anyone from the Japanese government, and that was hundreds of miles from here.”

“It is foolish to hope than ones such as us will ever truly be free as long as others live who covet our blood.” Finally freeing the can from its lid, Nano poured the soup into a saucepan and turned on the stovetop. “…But human beings are foolish creatures… and I’m no different.”

“Then I’m the same as you.” Akira leaned over and kissed Nano’s cheek, “I think that’s normal. We’ll both be idealistic fools together and hope for the best… even if we have to prepare ourselves for the worst.”

“It is human nature to strive for better than the lot fate has bestowed on us. But how high can we climb before we fall?”

“This isn’t so bad.” Akira finished up with the sandwiches and threw the empty jars in the recycling bin. “I don’t think this sadness is born from wanting something _better_ , I think it’s just that we both know how painful it would be if this were all suddenly taken away from us. And that just means that it’s something worth having. Something worth fighting for. Everything good in life is.”

“…Akira, even if everything is torn away in an instant, even if my body is ripped to shreds and I am left bleeding in the street, even if we are captured and forced back onto the dark path we have fled… I will always be grateful to you. Thank you, Akira, for my life.”

Akira leaned over to give Nano a lingering kiss as he watched him stir the soup.

“It _won’t_ end like that, though. I won’t let it. And you won’t either, will you? You’ll fight just as hard as I will.”

Nano smiled, a warm shock spreading from the point where Akira’s lips grazed his skin as he wrapped his arms around his waist, leaning in close.

“…Yes. Of course I will, Akira.”

“Promise, then. Promise me that you won’t ever lay down and submit to the hands of fate. Promise you won’t let anyone do to you any of the horrible things they have done before.”

“…I promise, Akira. I will fight for you, and for what we have together. Always.”

“Good.” Akira smiled. “I think the soup is done. Let’s have dinner.”

Nano turned off the stove and set to dishing the little roman letters into two bowls. As he watched, Akira took out a drinking glass to serve as a vase, plopping the remaining roses that Nano hadn’t eaten yet into it and setting it on the middle of the table. He then took out a small candle from the pink bag he had been carrying around, set it beside the roses, and lit it. He dimmed the lights. The tiny flame reflected off the glass and cast dancing shadows along the walls. It looked almost… magical. Like a part of some forbidden winter ritual he was just now being initiated into.

“What is the significance of all this?” Nano asked, carrying over the soup bowls and taking a seat opposite Akira. Akira shrugged with feigned indifference, but Nano knew perfectly well that Akira never did anything without intention.

“I dunno. The cafe was decorated with candles and flowers earlier, so I figured it was probably a Canadian Valentine’s day tradition. My client gave me an awful lot of candles. Our house is going to smell like that crystal and candle shop down the street from the bookstore.”

“Strange. I wonder what they are for. What else did she give you?”

“I’m not sure. She just told me that she got me a few things to set the mood… so I assume they’re decorations.”

“…Are any of them medieval torture devices?”

Akira paused mid-bite.

“Wait… _what_?! Why on earth would you think THAT?”

“A lot of the books I sold in the shop today had pictures of people tied up with ribbons or rope in elaborate designs. There were usually torture implements like whips and floggers shown in the image as well - the kinds of things that used to be used for corporal punishment in medieval times.”

“Um… I’m not even going to ask why Edith stocks books like that in her shop, but I guess if they’re selling so well…”

“Do you know what the significance of such books are to this holiday?”

“…I guess some people are into that sort of thing? It’s like… some kind of kinky game, I think. It has some four letter acronym that I always forget.”

“Have you ever played it, Akira?”

At this question, Akira nearly spit out his soup. This mystery was growing more intriguing by the minute.

“NO! Of course not! Why would you think that?! Anyway, I’m pretty sure there’s nothing like _that_ in this bag. So just forget about it.”

If Akira truly wished to dissuade him, he was doing a fantastically terrible job of it. His reactions only made him more curious, inspiring him to probe deeper.

“Why?”

“…It’s some kind of sex game, okay? _Of course_ I’ve never played it. I’ve never been with anyone besides you.”

“If you tell me how to play, I will play with you, Akira.”

Even in the dim light, Nano could see Akira’s face flush.

“What’s wrong with you?! I don’t want to play the medieval torture device game! A better question is, why on earth do _you_ want to play it? You don’t even know anything about it.”

“Because I want to see you on your knees dripping with desire, begging me to take you.”

As predicted, Akira’s already flushed skin went red hot, and his eyes widened.

“What the hell kind of smut are you reading at that bookshop?!”

“Nothing. I haven’t had any time to read. I just saw the back cover of one of the books a customer bought. She wanted my opinion on her taste in literature.”

“Um… Right. _Sure_ she did.”

“…Can I look inside the bag?”

“Yeah, sure. Why not?”

Akira fumbled for the pink bag. He was still beat red, and his hands were trembling. Nano made a mental note to read that book as soon as possible.

“See, it’s perfectly innocent. Just candles, candles… another candle… more candles… some lotion?”

Nano picked up the small bottle. ‘Heated edible vanilla personal lubricant.’

“Akira, what is ‘personal lubricant’?”

Akira froze, and again his skin flushed.

“Why the hell is _that_ even in there…” he grumbled picking up the bag. “Just put it away. We don’t need it.”

“Why won’t you tell me what it is, Akira? Is something it for sex?”

“…Yeah.”

“But… you can also eat it?”

“…Yeah.”

“Then…” Nano leaned in closer, licking his lips. “Does it go well with ice cream?”

“ _What?!_ ”

“…It says it’s vanilla. I thought it might make a nice dessert.”

Akira covered his mouth, trying to hold back his laughter and failing miserably. Nano wasn’t quite sure what he said that was so amusing, but it was nice seeing Akira laugh so freely. He turned the bottle over, trying to read the fine print.

“Though… if it is heated, it would probably melt ice cream…”

“…I’ll tell you what.” Akira leaned in, still blushing, to give Nano a brief kiss on the lips. But even that light touch was enough to ignite a spark and set his blood aflame. “I’ll, um… help you figure out what it’s for later tonight, okay?”

Heat coursed through his veins at the unspoken promise.

Nano smiled, setting the small bottle down and reaching into the mysterious pink bag himself to see what other wonders lay in store. Next, he pulled out what appeared to be two identical red silk scarves.

“Do you know what these are for, Akira?” Nano thread the soft cloth through his fingers. One might think them to be matching garments, except that they were too thin and light to keep anyone warm.

“Those look like big ribbons.” Akira shrugged, “I think they’re just decorations. You tie them on… something… to make them look nice.”

Something…

…Or some _one_.

Nano smiled evilly.

“…I know what these are for, Akira.”

“Well, good, because I don’t.” Akira reached into the bag, pulling out another mystery object. “How about this flaky heart thing?”

Nano took it from Akira’s outstretched hand, turning it over slowly to read the writing on the wrapper.

“It says ‘soothing romantic bath bomb.’ Perhaps you put it in the bathtub and it explodes?”

“Huh… I’m not sure how that’s soothing _or_ romantic.”

“We can try it tonight. It’s been a long time since we have taken a bath together, Akira.”

“We don’t have a very big bathtub. And if it explodes, we won’t have one at all.”

“I don’t think it will. There are instructions on here and it says to just drop it into the water to release the magic.”

“…‘Release the magic?’ What the hell does that even mean?”

“I’m not certain. It is a mystery we shall solve together.”

This was actually kind of… fun? Was that the right word? Nano was quite certain that neither of them would have ever purchased any of this on their own. It was like discovering hidden treasure, and one never knew what secrets they might unearth.

“Hmm. And then there is this… thing…” Akira held up a strange device that looked like a pink plastic egg attached to a remote control, and set it on the table between them. The pair starred in silent confusion as they each tried to ascertain what it might be.

“…You have no idea on this one either, huh?”

Alas, even reading the descriptions on the packaging did little to help.

“It’s a… ‘vibrating egg’…? Perhaps you put an egg in it? And it scrambles it?”

Akira looked unconvinced.

“Why the hell would you need a special device just for that? You can scramble an egg with a chopstick. That seems… unnecessarily complex.”

“Hmm… The package also says it’s waterproof. Maybe you put it in the bathtub, too.”

“Maybe…”

“We could try it out and see.”

“Why not? A hot bath is starting to sound really good right now.”

To tell the truth, hot baths and long showers were some of Nano’s favorite indulgences. The feeling of hot water running over his bare skin felt decadent. On lazy days he would read for hours soaking in the warm water.

The only thing better than warm baths… were warm baths with Akira.

“Should I start the water, Akira? The pipes are cold, so it will take a while to heat up.”

“Sure.” Akira’s eyes were sparking in the dim candlelight. “You do that, and once I get the dishes put away, I’ll come join you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nano's place of employment in this story is based on a real place!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The sex scenes wound up much longer than I intended! I really struggle with writing fluff and loving, consensual smut while trying to keep it sexy and interesting. But I've found that it's a little more fun with characters who have no idea what they're doing. (LOL) I hope that you enjoy this shamelessly self-indulgent smut regardless. 
> 
> ...There's a little hint/preview of incubus Akira mixed in there in some parts. >:)

A dozen candles flickered in the small run-down bathroom, transforming the broken tile and outdated wallpaper into something straight out of a fairytale. Flames reflected off the cracked mirror and frosted windows, casting a sparkling glow on the falling snowflakes drifting past their windows outside.

“Are you ready, Akira?”

The two refugees had both cast off their clothes, and stood naked in the doorway. Nano slid his hands around his lover’s bare waist as the other nodded resolutely. This was it - Akira took a deep breath…

…And tossed the unwrapped bath bomb into the tub.

Akira grabbed the doorknob instinctively, preparing to slam it shut should the reaction in the water prove hazardous. They heard a thud, then a strange fizzing sound… but nothing explosive. After a few moments of watching from the doorway, the pair crept closer to see what had become of their experiment.

“It’s so… pink.”

Nano stared down at the tub as a swirling mist of color quickly dyed the water. Flowers trapped within drifted to the surface, and the floral aroma that already permeated the room grew stronger. It was like they had stepped through a rabbit hole and found themselves in Wonderland, in the midst of an enchanted garden where nothing was quite as it seemed.

“It doesn’t seem dangerous… but it doesn’t look like something one should bathe in, either. How the hell is _that_ going to get us clean? We’ll come out fuschia.”

“Perhaps it acts like soap? The fragrance is alluring.”

“Yeah, it smells nice. But I’ve never taken a bath in pink water before, and my brain is somewhat appalled at the thought. It’s just getting… pinker… as that thing dissolves. I guess I’ll close my eyes and tell myself I’m stepping into a bath of soap.”

“Shall we get in?”

“…Wait, let’s try that other bath thing and see what it does first.”

“The egg? Shall I just throw it in?”

“No. It has a controller attached, so we probably have to turn it on first for it to do anything. Here, give it to me.”

Akira took the mysterious device and tried pressing the buttons. As soon as it turned on, the egg began to buzz. Akira nearly dropped it from his hand.

“What the hell…”

Without further ceremony, Akira dropped it into the water with a soft plop. The egg portion soon disappeared beneath the surface, hitting the porcelain floor with a loud thud that soon became an obnoxious echoing buzz.

In an effort to stop the racket, Akira grabbed for the remote floating on the surface to adjust the controls. Alas, the only thing the little plus and minus buttons seemed to do was adjust the frequency of the unholy vibration. As far as Nano could tell, it didn’t seem to be having any effect on the water.

“…Were we supposed to put this thing in _before_ the bath bomb, perhaps?”

“I dunno, but this is definitely _not_ relaxing. I think we’re not doing it right. I’ll ask one of my coworkers about it tomorrow when I go in for work.”

Akira shut off the device, removing it from the water and setting it back on the sink to dry. Nano continued to stare for a moment in quiet contemplation. That obnoxious buzzing sound reminded him of something, but for the life of him, he couldn’t place what it was. He shook his head. It was a mystery for another day.

It was getting cold standing around the bathroom naked. Pink or not, Nano was eager to get into the warm water, though Akira still looked mildly concerned about the prospect.

“Do you want me to go first, Akira? I don’t mind being your test subject.”

“…Don’t say it that way, Nikolai…”

Before Akira could talk him out of it, Nano stepped into the foamy swirling mixture.

“I’m teasing.” Nano made himself comfortable resting against the back of the bathtub. “Come in, Akira. It feels like normal water, it’s just… soft and fragrant.”

Akira still looked skeptical, but climbed into the bathtub nonetheless, seating himself between Nano’s legs and resting his back against his lover’s chest.

“…You are developing a very strange sense of humor, you know.”

“Is that bad?”

“No… I guess not. It’s kind of cute.”

Akira turned slightly to place a gentle kiss on his lover’s lips before settling back against his pale, slender form.

“I can never tell if you’re being serious or not. I never would have guessed back in Toshima that one day you would be teasing me with morbidly weird jokes wearing that same deadpan expression of yours. Weird _riddles_ , yes, that I could imagine. But that was such a long time ago. It feels like another world away.”

“Do you miss my riddles, Akira?”

“…I was never very good at riddles.”

“I will ask you an easy one.”

“Your riddles are so random… I can never think of the right answer.”

“This one is not random at all.”

“…Then go ahead, I guess.”

“The rich and poor both desire me.  
The coward and the hero both crave me.  
The desperate and the satisfied both want me.  
Yet the only one who can feel me,  
Is the one who already has me.  
…What am I?”

Akira groaned.

“You know I’m going to get this wrong.”

“Try. What is something that everyone wants, but only those who have can feel?”

“…………”

“It is something that you and I have, Akira. And I have only ever felt it because of you.”

“…A cat?”

“No.” Nano smiled, cupping his hands to draw the warm fragrant water up over his lover’s body. “The answer is not a physical thing.”

“…Emotions?”

“You are on the right track. But not all emotions are desired universally. Grief, for instance. Or loneliness. This answer is a _specific_ emotion… one which is celebrated on this day. And one which I feel every day that I am with you.”

“…Love?”

“Yes. The answer is ‘love.’ See, you got it right after all, Akira.”

Nano squeezed him tightly, breathing in his unique scent over the floral perfume wafting through the air.

“…Only after a ton of hints.”

“I don’t mind giving you hints. But I did not tell you the answer - you figured it out yourself.”

“Ha, hardly.”

“You did. Here.”

Nano reached over the side of the tub and plucked a chocolate from the box. He offered it to Akira, along with a kiss. Akira laughed softly under his breath.

“I’m not sure I should get a reward for that.”

“It’s not a reward for the riddle itself, but for what the riddle symbolizes. I love you, Akira. If it were not for you, I would never have known this feeling.”

Akira leaned forward, gingerly accepting the chocolate from his fingertips.

“Alright, I’ll accept that. But…” Akira leaned over and chose another chocolate, holding it up to Nano’s lips almost menacingly, “The same is true for me, so you have to eat one, too.”

Nano knew better than to object. He opened his mouth obligingly, and was rewarded with the delicate lingering taste of chocolate and maple melting on his tongue.

Akira smirked, seemingly pleased with his lover’s response. Nano reached up, caressing his cheek.

“Shall I ask you another, Akira?”

“No, no…”

“Are you tired of my riddles already?”

Akira sighed. He found the sound quite cute, even when he knew it was meant to dissuade him.

“Let’s just relax in this… pink flower water… for a while.”

“ _One_ more.” Nano nipped lightly at his ear. “I think you will get this one.”

“…I won’t, but go ahead anyway. This is the last one, though.”

“I thought all I could ever know was despair,  
Yet in my darkest hour I saw him standing there.  
He made me believe I could defy my dark fate,  
Then took my hand and said, “Our future is ours to create.”  
…Of whom do I speak?”

Silence fell, and for a moment, Nano was mildly concerned that even the subject of _this_ riddle may have been too obscure for his lover. If he got this wrong, there was truly no hope for him. That was alright, he supposed. He loved Akira just the same, even if he was terrible at riddles.

Finally, Akira spoke, breaking the murky stillness that lingered in the air between them.

“…The answer is me, isn’t it?”

“Yes.” Nano hugged him tight. “The answer is Akira.”

Unable to resist, Nano showered the back of his head with kisses. He wished he could kiss him all over, but for now he settled for the places he could easily reach. Leaning down, he took another chocolate from the box and offered it to his lover as a reward. This time, Akira graciously accepted.

“Where did you hear a riddle like _that_? It’s more like a poem.”

“I made it up myself.”

“When?”

“Just now.”

“………” Akira looked contemplative, “You get to eat another chocolate, too, as a reward for thinking up a riddle that I could actually answer.”

Nano accepted his gift obligingly, savoring the creamy interior as the chocolate shell melted on his tongue. This one was rose flavored, decadent, and even more delicious than the bouquet Akira had given him earlier.

Akira snuggled closer and Nano wrapped his arms around his small, strong body, reaching for the shower gel. It was deeply soothing being so close to another person without the barrier of cloth between them. Warm. Intimate. Even in the lab, when he was made to stand naked before panels of scientists so that they could examine every inch of his body, the barriers were always there. It was all so clinical. They always kept their gloves on when they touched him, as though his body were poison. Perhaps because it was.

Nano closed his eyes. The only sounds he could hear in the quiet echo of the tiled room were the sounds of their relaxed breathing, the gentle swish of the water as their chests rose and fell and their hands tenderly washed and explored one another’s bodies. It wasn’t sexual, though Nano could not deny that there was an erotic element involved. Alone, a single naked human was so vulnerable, and when another joined, they were completely exposed. Like this, they could share their bodies freely, hiding nothing from one another. So many of their secrets were laid bare, carved into their flesh. Their goal now wasn’t excitement or pleasure. It was merely acceptance. A confirmation of their existence.

Slender fingers caressed his lover’s shoulders, arms, back, chest, feeling each dip in his body’s lithe musculature, memorizing it. Akira’s body would never cease to be beautiful to him. Even years from now, when the ravages of age took their toll, and the shadow of death lingered closer over them both, he knew that Akira would still be the most beautiful thing he had ever laid eyes upon. Each line, each wrinkle, all of these would one day stand as a testament to their shared life together, proof that love truly could defy fate.

Anointing his hands with shower gel, Nano slowly caressed each inch of his beloved’s skin, savoring the subtle feel of strong, tight muscles moving beneath soft skin. Akira’s eyes were closed, his weight resting on Nano’s chest, fingertips gently exploring his slender body, tracing over the scars that marred Nano’s pale skin and caressing them lovingly.

Following his motions with his eyes, Nano found himself entranced by the rhythmic movement of his hands and a deep relaxation began to settle over his body. With each gentle stroke, he could feel emotion spilling out from his heart, filling his once empty soul.

Akira turned, resting his hands on Nano’s thighs as he knelt facing him in the water. Blue eyes met, gazing up at him with fascinated wonder. It reminded him a bit of the way Negai often looked at him, full of love and innocent curiosity. Sometimes, when he didn’t think Nano was watching, he would sometimes catch Akira staring at him like this for hours at a time as he read by the fireplace or gazed out the window.

Unable to resist the temptation, Nano took hold of his beloved’s chin, drawing him up until their lips met. He sighed into the kiss, parting Akira’s lips to slip his tongue into the warmth of his mouth.

“…You taste like peanut butter.”

Akira grinned pleasantly in response, reaching up to run his fingers over Nano’s slender chest.

“And you taste like maple trees and roses. I feel like I’m tasting a garden whenever we kiss.”

Nano traced his wet fingers along the outline of his lover’s jaw, savoring the supple texture of his skin.

“…Do you dislike it?”

“Of course not.”

As if to prove the point, Akira reached up to grab onto the back of Nano’s neck and pull him in for another deep kiss, tongue teasing and playful, biting softly on his lower lip as he pulled away. It ended all too briefly, leaving him wanting for more.

“Do the rose chocolates taste good? I’ve never eaten anything with flowers in it before.”

“That’s not true, Akira. We had sakura flavor Solids in Japan last time we visited. And sakura ice cream. And sakura soda...”

“I don’t know if that counts. The Japanese have sakura flavored _everything_ in the spring.”

“It counts. Why would it not? Sakura blossoms and roses are both flowers. Both taste very good. But… these rose chocolates are especially delicious. Here, try one, Akira.”

Akira looked skeptical, but nonetheless took the chocolate with his lips from Nano’s hand when it was offered. His eyes widened in surprise as the flavor hit his tongue and a pleasant smile settled on his lips, which Nano traced with his fingertips.

“See? I was not lying.”

“Sometimes I’m not really sure about some of the things you eat, but… I actually agree with you on these. They _are_ very good. I had no idea that roses could be this tasty. Maybe I’ll join you in finishing off that bouquet.”

“I would love to share with you, Akira.”

Nano pulled him into a deep embrace. It felt so good relaxing in this fragrant water with his beloved kneeling between his legs, their bodies sliding together almost as though they had been put there by design. Akira looked so alive, so vibrant with this candlelight glistening off of his wet body, highlighting every dip and crevice of his lithe form.

Suddenly, almost without warning, Akira leaned down, pressing his lips and teeth to the soft tissue-paper skin just below Nano’s collarbone. Nano’s breath caught in his throat, head leaning back, inviting the other to do whatever he pleased. Akira kissed his marred skin, evidence he would always bear of the wounds he had suffered when his body had been taken from him and his soul had all but been extinguished. Nano’s breath caught in his throat.

It was a ritual of sorts. A confirmation of Akira’s unconditional acceptance of him. Proof that no matter what he was, what things he had done, Akira would still love him. Even in his darkest hours, Akira would always be there to kiss the blood from his hands.

Fire began to light in his veins as Akira alternated between sweet kisses and gentle nibbles along his scarred flesh, leaving teasing shocks in his wake as their opposite blood reacted. Nano gasped softly as his hands found their way to the other’s back and tangled in his hair.

Akira’s tongue flickered across his nipples, and Nano’s vision went red. Arousal crashed over him like a tidal wave, slender fingers curling in silver hair as he surrendered to the sensations and his body slid deeper into the water.

“ _Haaaa_ …… _haaaaa_ ……”

Akira’s teeth soon joined in the onslaught, climbing on top of him, nails digging into the ridges of Nano’s scars to scrape jagged red lines into his pale skin. The feeling of Akira’s lips touching those cursed marks, clawing at them, wanting what was left of him in spite of them…

His mind was melting, his soul soaring. It felt too good to be real, being wanted like this. Desired not merely as a vessel for his cursed blood, but as a man.

His beloved’s hand slid up between his spread thighs almost without warning, rubbing against his erect shaft. Akira leaned in, pressing their bodies together, leaving no doubt in his mind that Akira wanted this as badly as he did.

A soft kiss brushed against his lips, so light after the fury from before that he might have missed it over his own desperate pants.

Akira gazed down at him lovingly with a mischievous smile as he pulled away.

“…Shall we continue this in the bedroom…?”

* * *

Candlelight lit up the small chamber, painting the room with light and shadow. The bedroom, like the bathroom before, had been completely transformed into something straight from another world. Akira had carefully moved each of the lit candles from one room to the other, placing them around their windowsill and nightstands. In the center of the room was the bed that the two of them shared each and every night.

As far as Nano was concerned, there was no place in their home more sacred. Now, the discolored quilts were draped with red silk. With so many candles strewn about the room and their shared bed in the center, it almost reminded him of the inner sanctum of a church, and he couldn’t help but feel that he was looking upon something holy.

And now, his lover sat naked on the makeshift altar, fair skin glistening in the flickering candlelight, looking more like an angel than a man, beckoning for Nano to join him in this sacrament.

…It was too much to resist.

Without hesitation, Nano crawled on top of Akira and straddled his hips, pushing him back onto the pillows and drawing him into a deep kiss. Akira responded in kind, nipping playfully at his lower lip.

“…How do you want me?”

Those words echoed in his ears, sending a wave of heat crashing through his system that set all of the cursed blood in his body to simmering.

Akira gazed up at him with pure, untainted love, running his fingers through his black curls lovingly. It was a sight he never thought he would see, so beautiful it broke his heart to pieces.

All his life, Nano had truly believed that he would die without ever knowing how it felt to be touched by someone who looked back into his unnatural eyes with desire rather than fear. It was his last wish. An impossible dream. Something private Nano kept locked away in his heart and never spoke of, holding tightly for fear that someday even this desperate fantasy would be taken away as the doctors worked to strip him of his emotions and humanity. And still, when he lay awake at night in Toshima with only his books and nightmarish memories to keep him company as he awaited his own death, he imagined it over and over, the only comfort remaining to one whose fate had already been sealed.  
  
Akira had come, like an angel from heaven, to offer him salvation, and given him so much more than he had ever once believed possible. And Nano would cherish him forever. He wanted to see him writhing in pleasure at his touch, gasping his name, eyes clouded with desire, sweet moans spilling from his lips as they held one another tight, their colors blended for all eternity.

More than anything, Nano wanted to be worthy of him. Worthy of penetrating his body without fear of desecration, though he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that when he finished his supplication, this pristine angel would be an utter mess.

…Just like him.

But like all damned creatures condemned to hell, he too longed for a taste of heaven. Perhaps, when their bodies joined and their souls merged, he might even be purified.

“I want to worship you.”

Slender fingers took hold of Akira’s knees, parting his legs until there was enough space for him to settle between his spread thighs. Akira fidgeted, fighting back simultaneous embarrassment and arousal as Nano shamelessly drank him with his eyes. Akira’s body still smelled of fresh flowers from the bath, pure, clean. A flicker of purple trickled through his irises, growing steadily as his gaze drifted down Akira’s exposed body.

Before those eyes even reached his belly, Akira’s cock twitched provocatively, drawing his attention instantly lower. It never ceased to amaze him how aroused his beloved could get without even being touched whenever he was watched by those hungry violet eyes.

Akira tried to move his hands to hide himself, but Nano grabbed both his wrists, pinning him to the bed. Trapped, exposed, and unable to hide his excitement, Akira turned his head, ashamed to meet his gaze.

Nano leaned down, placing his lips gently, almost reverently on the tip of Akira’s cock, as though it were possible to kiss away his beloved’s discomfort by confronting its source directly. Blood rushed unbidden to the point where his lips made contact. A flicker of tongue followed, tasting the freshly cleaned skin, and was rewarded with another throbbing pulse. Akira squirmed, holding his breath.

Nano threaded a piece of red silk from the bed between his fingertips, draping it over him like an altar, watching it fall into the dip of his lover’s belly button as he caressed it between his spread legs to cup his rising erection. Akira squirmed, gasping as Nano rubbed him gently through the cloth, tracing his fingertips along the edges of his cock. Despite the temporary cover, the cloth was so thin that very little was left to the imagination. He could see the detailed outline of Akira’s cock as it lay against his belly, down to the crease in the ridge along its tip. The bulge of his balls as he tucked the cloth beneath was almost obscene.

Akira blushed, but said nothing, lips parting as Nano teased and caressed his most sensitive organs until moisture began to seep through the thin cloth, leaving a stain of deep red against the crimson.

Nano bent down, lowering himself to mouth his lover’s cock where it lay trapped beneath the fine silk.

“ _Haaaa_ …… _Mmmm_ ……”

The cloth was growing increasingly soaked from his lover’s fluids and he could taste the bitter flavor through the silk. Akira’s hips bucked up towards his mouth as he teased the sensitive bulge with his hungry lips.

Violet eyes gazed up through long eyelashes. Slowly Nano slid the silk off to expose his pink tip, his swollen shaft, his tightening balls, draping it gracefully across his thighs to frame his most intimate parts. Akira twisted his hips instinctively in a vain bid for cover that only emphasized his sudden nudity.

Nano slid his fingers down Akira’s moistened shaft, stroking it lovingly. Akira tried to choke back a pleasured groan as his tongue flickered out to caress the bottom of the ridge, working his way up to the slit. By the time his tongue circled his lover’s tip, Akira wasn’t even trying to hold back his sighs.

Curling his fingers through fistfuls of dyed black curls, Akira stared down at him with wide blue eyes as Nano tipped back his head and took him into his mouth. He welcomed him, wrapping his legs around Nano’s shoulders, pulsing his hips in rhythm with Nano’s movements.

“ _Nnnnnn_ … _Haaaa_ …”

Akira’s sweet voice was spilling freely now. That voice intoxicated him, setting fire in his blood that spread out to each and every cell in his body.

Nano slid his hands down beneath Akira’s bucking hips, delighting in the way that plump, rounded flesh squeezed and contracted when his fingers curled into it. Drawing Akira’s hips up, he slid his tongue across the other’s weeping slit, tilting his head just so to draw him deeper into his throat.

And then his very breath was taken away.

The moment he was fully impaled on Akira’s shaft, he could no longer breathe. Akira cried out, writhing, back arched as Nano worked his shaft, alternating between frenzied circles with his tongue and swallowing him whole. The feeling of that throbbing flesh thrusting inside him, filling him, _pulsing_ with pleasure, was like nothing he had ever felt. Cutting off his own air supply for the sake of his partner’s pleasure was such an intimate act that the mere thought of offering himself this way swamped him with dizziness and euphoria. Intimacy rife with lust mingled with something darker, something primitive and visceral… a sort of sanguine surrender that made his limbs weak and his field of vision shake.

Nano knew Akira would never ask such a sacrifice of him. But it didn’t matter. He _wanted_ this. _Desperately_. Akira was too far gone to care, breathing ragged as Nano lapped his tongue greedily along the other’s shaft. Akira's hands tangled in black curls, pulling hard, sending shocks of pain through his scalp, nearly impaling him in his unrelenting bid for friction as he struggled to keep the last vestiges of earthly control. In response, Nano showered his cock with attention, licking him ravenously, twisting his tongue, and sucking him down over and over.

Nano drew back, breathless, wrapping his hand around his shaft. His limbs were trembling with desire and his breath was ragged as he squeezed his hand around the hot, aching flesh between his fingers.

Reaching clumsily for the red silk, his fingers instead alighted against something else, hitting hard, and he could feel a sharp vibration on the sheets. Trembling fingers traced the object, identifying it as that strange egg-like device they had both failed to identify earlier.

Something about the way it felt when it vibrated against his hand was oddly… familiar… tangled far back in the dark dripping walls of his memories.

“ _Nnnnn_ … Just forget that stupid thing.”

Akira’s voice was breathless. Yet… the longer he held the device, the more certain he became.

“I think… that I know what this is for, Akira.”

“……Really? What is it?”

Akira’s expression looked almost annoyed at that point. He seemed to have given up on the purpose behind the mysterious pink plastic egg and was eager to once more feel his cock between his lover’s lips.

“I will show you.”

He placed the egg gently against Akira’s swollen cock.

Akira’s eyes widened and he nearly screamed, writhing as he tried to sit up to escape, but Nano pushed him back down, keeping him pinned to the bed.

“………! What are you… _Ahhh_ … _Nnnn_ ……”

“Do you like it, Akira?”

Slowly, Nano rolled the pink egg around Akira’s engorged shaft, licking the bitter droplets spilling from his tip as his legs slid uselessly against the bed in a desperate bid for traction. His cock was so aroused that it was nearly purple, throbbing almost painfully, his slit weeping profusely.

“…It’s intense, isn’t it?”

“ _Haaa_ …. _nnnnn_ …… stop it… _Nikolai_ … _nnnnnn_ … Let me go, damn it!”

“…No.”

“ _Ahhhh, haaa_ ….”

“You look so beautiful, Akira.”

He probably didn’t realize he was doing it, but Akira’s hips were pulsing almost involuntarily, bucking his cock into Nano’s waiting hand in a reckless bid for more. He writhed, unable to stifle the cries that escaped his lips as his body was forced to greater heights of pleasure.

“ _Damn you! Haaa_ … This isn’t fair…”

“What isn’t fair about it, Akira?”

Akira clawed at the sheets, thrashing his body against the bed, unable to escape the onslaught.

“It should be… _ahh_ … both of us… not just _me_ … It’s… _nnnn_ … humiliating with you watching.”  
  
Nano’s brow furrowed, considering the proposition.

“Then I will do it with you so we feel everything together.”

“…Huh?!”

Nano leaned over Akira’s writhing body, keeping his position between the other’s spread legs as he aligned himself, chest against chest, cock against cock. The other was looking up at him incredulously, breathless and panting, as though he didn’t quite believe that Nano would really follow through with his offer.

Nano was already fully hard and dripping, his neglected cock as yet untouched, begging for release, yet the intense pleasure that hit him when he grasped both their cocks together and thrust his shaft against Akira’s was so overwhelming that it was all he could do to keep his balance poised over his lover’s body. He inhaled sharply, struggling not to collapse.

Long fingers raked through silver hair as Nano used his free hand to draw Akira’s head back at a more fitting angle to snare his lips. His limbs were shaking, his body moving of its own accord. His cries disappeared down the other’s throat as he kissed him deeply, prying the other’s lips apart to slip his tongue between his lips.

Akira watched him with wide eyes, incredulous, drinking in the sight as he canted his hips deliberately against the other’s, thrusting his cock against Nano’s into his hand. The moment Nano broke their kiss, panting, Akira lifted his head, eyes trailing down their bodies towards the point where they were connected.

“You really… _Mmm_ …!”

When Nano finally regained enough composure to glance down and see where he was looking, the sight of those two hardnesses slipping through his slender fingers against the vibrator, hot, dripping with need, was breathtakingly erotic.

Nano’s breath deepened, writhing against the other’s cock shamelessly, biting into the sculpted muscles of his partner’s shoulder, stopping just short of drawing blood.

Please, _yes_ …

Trembling fingers stroked the side of Akira’s face lovingly, savoring the sound of his uncontrolled moans echoing in his ear as he tried desperately to keep from succumbing to the intense vibration.

Akira wrapped his arms around Nano’s back, digging his nails into his flesh in a desperate bid to regain some small semblance of control as his body was forced closer to the brink. Akira’s clouded eyes were boring into his own so deeply it was as though they could see through to his very soul.

All at once it became too much. Akira’s fingers curled, hips going suddenly rigid. It was all Nano could do to silence both of their screams by forcing their lips together as he lost control and his body toppled over the edge after, spraying hot seed onto Akira’s stomach and chest in a sudden rush of euphoria.

All too soon, the vibration grew almost painful in its intensity. Nano dropped the egg, finishing them both off in his hand as their fluids blended together and their bodies were enveloped in a sweet, blissful fog.

Akira looked so decadent, disheveled, covered in mixed rivulets of white from both their bodies, gasping, gazing up at him with those blue eyes full of wonder he had come to love so dearly.

Nano wanted to kiss him all over, hold him so close he never had to let him go, but his body was still shaking from the intensity and it was all he could do to place a single, breathless kiss on his forehead. As each of them struggled to catch their breath, limbs weak and trembling, Nano slowly repositioned himself to his beloved’s side, grabbing a tissue from the nightstand to help clean his lover’s breathtakingly erotic body. Most of the semen had landed on his stomach and chest, but a few stray drops had shot far enough to graze his chin, and these he cleaned lovingly with his tongue. It would go without saying, he supposed, that they were going to need another bath after this.

Akira took a deep breath, lips curling into a dazed smile as he brought one shaking hand to his forehead and laughed softly under his breath.

“Heh… I can’t help but wonder if that’s actually what that thing is _supposed_ to do, or if we just did something absurdly lewd with a bath toy.”

Nano smiled, placing a gentle kiss on his cheek.

“That is the purpose of a vibrator, Akira.”

Once his body had been cleaned, Akira turned over onto his stomach, propping himself up in his elbows as he smiled down at his raven haired lover.

“Why on earth would you even know something like that, anyway? I seriously doubt they had vibrators at ENED.”

“………………”

Nano’s eyes lowered.

“…Right…?”

A chill settled over his cooling limbs. He pulled Akira close, savoring the warmth of his skin.

“…Is there something you’re not telling me, Nikolai?”

In truth, Nano didn’t want to speak. He knew Akira would not like the answer to this question. It would be better for them both to remain silent. So he buried his face in his lover’s neck, savoring the scent of fresh floral soap mixed with masculine sweat.

“…Nikolai?”

Akira’s voice was edged with concern. Nano sighed softly, closing his eyes. A strange, almost crippling emotion had begun to crawl over his flesh. He wasn’t certain why. Was he simply trying to savor the afterglow?

Or was he afraid that Akira’s concerned expression might melt to disgust?

Nano gazed up through long eyelashes, forcing himself to meet Akira’s questioning gaze.

He wasn’t familiar with this feeling. Could it be… was this… what shame felt like?

Finally he spoke, his voice a deep, soft whisper.

“…They did have them. They didn’t look like this, but they felt similar.”

As predicted, Akira’s eyes widened in a mixture of confusion and horror, sending a shard of ice straight through his heart. Nano closed his eyes, shutting it out, pulling him closer, burying his face in his neck and breathing in his scent.

“Wait… what the hell were they _doing_ to you that required vibrators?!”

…Wasn’t the answer to that obvious?

“Semen collection… did the researchers do it to you, too, Akira?”

Akira’s expression alone was more than sufficient to answer the question.

“I should certainly _hope_ not! I was still a kid when I was adopted out. I doubt my body was even producing semen back then. And… even so... that doesn’t explain why the hell would they need to get so kinky with it?!”

“They did not always use devices to do it. Often whoever was assigned the task simply put on gloves and used their hands to stimulate me manually until they got what they wanted. But… most of them did not like to touch me. They did not even look at me if they could avoid it. They found me repulsive, and feared that anything coming from my body would be toxic. So if they were feeling impatient, if I was too sedated to do as they asked, or if I just wasn’t fast enough, they would use a vibrator on my shaft to force me to cum on command.”

Akira was silent, staring at him with wide eyes, the tender mood all but vanished, seemingly paralyzed by this new revelation.

“……I’m sorry. I didn’t realize they were doing _that_ to you in there. I don’t mean to sound so shocked. I’m not even sure why I’m surprised, after everything else they did to your body without your consent. I’m so sorry, Nikolai.”

“Truthfully, most of the time, I did not mind. I lacked a sense of shame and it was less difficult or painful than most of the other things that were done to me at the facility. But… sometimes they would do it over and over until I was drained to the point that there was nothing left. I did not mind if they only took a bit, but it hurt if they took too much from me at once. If I so much as breathed a sigh of protest, they would shove an electrode inside me and force ejaculation by electrocution.”

“…Wait, what the fuck… they put electrodes up your…?”

“Yes. That procedure wasn’t pleasant in the slightest. It _always_ hurt. Sometimes they would place it inside of me preemptively as an unspoken threat to encourage my cooperation in ensuring the procedure was completed in a timely fashion.”

“…What the _hell_?! Why on earth would they even _do_ that to you?” Akira’s tone had switched from concerned pity to anger.

“I don’t know. I assume they were gathering data on Nicole, but I’m not sure what that data was ever used for. Blood collection, semen collection, it was all the same. No one ever kept me informed. My understanding or consent wasn’t needed. I was only a weapon, after all. I was not permitted to ask questions regarding any of the things that were done to my body.”

“God… Nikolai…”

In the faint candlelight, he could see that Akira’s eyes were growing moist, and the sight broke his heart.

“Akira…” Nano pulled him closer, kissing him gently, “Akira, I did not mean to say things that upset you. Please do not concern yourself with my past. I have been so happy with you tonight. Please. It does not matter what happened to me then. That life is over. The only life I care about is the one I have with you… and I want to savor every minute that we have together.”

“…I’m so sorry. I wouldn’t have demanded that you do it with me if I had known.”

At this, Nano couldn’t help but smile.

“…Did I look like I was not enjoying it?”

He pulled Akira closer, kissing away the unfallen tears that lingered in his lover’s eyes.

“I loved every second of it, Akira. There was no time to reminisce about unpleasant memories from the past. I was caught up in your eyes, your impassioned moans, your desperate attempts to evade the pleasure you thought too intense to handle alone… and your surrender into my embrace as we threw ourselves over the edge of that threshold together.”

For a moment he simply held Akira close, stroking his back, gazing so deeply into those clear blue eyes that he thought he might willingly drown.

“Akira… I have never done anything like that with anyone other than you. I have no prior experiences which can compare. And I want… to keep exploring, and keep discovering new things together with you.”

Akira returned his affections in kind, wrapping his arms around Nano. But his eyes were still sad, still trapped far away in the past.

“…What did you think about… when they were touching you like that?”

Nano lowered his eyes.

“Most of the time, I did not think or feel anything at all. Stripped of emotion, sexuality becomes nothing more than another physiological process.”

Akira seemed to accept that answer, kissing his cheek and clutching him tighter.

“And now… with me…?”

“Now, I am overcome with love. When we embrace one another and share our bodies, that is the point I most clearly know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that this is real. That I am alive, and so are you. That our colors have truly blended. It is the most sacred act imaginable.”

Akira sighed, glaring off at some fixed point on the ceiling.

“…Then no one should ever touch you like that but me.”

Nano cocked his head.

“…Are you jealous, Akira?”

“I can’t help it. When I think of anyone else touching you like that, it infuriates me. Stories like that make me wish that everyone who who did those things to you were all dead.”

Nano laughed darkly under his breath.

“If it makes you feel any better… most of them are.”

At this, Akira actually snickered. Nano pulled him closer, kissing his cheeks, his jaw, his nose, his lips.

“I think your weird sense of humor is beginning to infect me.”

“How strange. I thought you were supposed to nullify it.”

“……Now you’re trying too hard.”

“Please kiss me, Akira.”

No sooner had the words left his lips than their lips were locked, and Akira was pushing him down into the pillows. Akira’s arms moved to his wrists, clasping their hands together and pinning him to the sheets as he kissed him over and over… slowly at first, but with a swift gradation of intensity that left him dizzy. Nano was melting. Dissolving. When Akira parted his lips and their tongues clashed, his heart was filled with unconditional acceptance. He truly was being purified. No matter what had happened in his past, he knew Akira loved him just the same. When he opened his eyes, Akira was above him, gazing down with a soft smile on his lips. Nano ran his fingertips lovingly over Akira’s, refusing to let go of his hands.

“I want to be inside of you tonight, Akira. Is that alright?”

Akira nodded.

“…I want that, too.”

Nano smiled, reaching up to brush the other’s bangs out of his eyes.

“It occurs to me belatedly that, in all of this, I haven’t done much to prepare you for it.”

“That’s alright… I mean, we have lube now, so we may as well use it.”

“………?”

Akira laughed under his breath, shaking his head.

“You’re surprisingly innocent sometimes. With everything else they were doing, I’m sure that ENED had lube. You were probably just daydreaming about something else and not paying attention when they used it. …Not that I blame you.”

“…Did they use it on you?”

“No.”

“Then… how do _you_ know about such things, Akira?”

Akira leaned over and kissed him playfully on the lips.

“Because I’m a man in a relationship with another man and people talk… so sometimes I get teased about those sorts of things. It’s inevitable, I guess.”

“Then tell me, Akira… what is ‘personal lubricant’ used for?”

“It’s…” Akira blushed, “…It’s supposed to go inside of the person who is being penetrated to make it easier for their partner to slide in.”

“But our bodies make their own fluids for that.”  
  
“Yeah, but it takes a while to get enough, especially if you’re a man, and you have to move it, and… I dunno. I’ve never used this stuff.”

Akira blushed, hands fidgeting with moistened red silk laying on the bed. Taking it from him, Nano threaded the silky fabric between his fingers.

“Heh… I’m pretty sure those were just intended as thematic decorations, but I liked your version better.”

“I believe they serve many purposes.”

Carefully, he slid it around his lover’s throat, fastening it at the back like a collar and tying it off with a simple bow.

Akira frowned, his eyes colored with confusion.

“…What are you doing?”

“These aren’t for decorating _things_ , Akira,” Nano explained, stroking his cheek, “They’re for decorating _people_. A lot of the books I sold today had pictures of people on the covers tied up in red silk.”

“…Around their necks? It seems like a good way to choke.”

“I was trying to match Yume’s collar we made him for Christmas. It was very cute.”

“…Why?”

“Because I thought you would look cute, too, Akira. Doesn’t it feel nice?”

In truth, the deep crimson silk contrasted beautifully with Akira’s fair skin, embellishing him in a way that not only made him look both sinfully decadent, but also emphasized his exposed flesh, leaving him even more naked than before. Even his annoyed expression only made him look cuter as Akira continued to pout.

“…I feel ridiculous.”

“We have two of these. If I wore one as well, would you feel less ridiculous?”

Akira sighed, shaking his head.

“…Canadians are so weird sometimes. I don’t get it. Are you _sure_ this is what the people on the covers of those books were wearing?”

Nano frowned, knitting his eyebrows together as he tried to recall the images in more detail.

“No… they weren’t _exactly_ like this.”

“How were they, then?”

“There were many designs. Here…”

Nano untied the bow around his lover’s neck, fastening them instead to his wrists, tying them both together in front of his body.

Akira continued to look unimpressed.

“This is even _more_ absurd. Now I can’t use my arms. Seriously, it’s just a ribbon. You’re supposed to tie it onto a chair or something.”

Hmm. There weren’t any chairs in the room, only the bed.

…………Ah.

“Now I see…”

“…What do you see?”

The corners of Nano’s mouth turned up in a knowing smirk.

“Red suits you, Akira.”

“…What does _that_ mean?”

“It will become part of tonight’s ritual.”

“…You lost me.”

“You will understand in a moment.”

Grabbing hold of the silk binding Akira’s wrists, Nano turned him over, binding his hands to the frame of the headboard such that he was pinned face down.

“What the hell, Nikolai! Let me go!”

Black hair trailed across Akira’s fair skin as Nano leaned down over his surprised victim, running his tongue from the base of his neck to his jawbone, placing open-mouthed kisses down his neck and back. Akira could do nothing to resist, simply glaring back at him incredulously. Licking his lips, Nano drank in the sight of his naked lover sprawled out on the bed like a sacrificial offering.

“…Do you trust me?”

A peculiar question to ask when he knew his beloved could see the predatory gleam in his eyes, the thinly veiled threat lurking just beneath the surface that clamored to devour him alive.

Yet despite that iridescent purple flash, Akira nonetheless reluctantly nodded his consent. He jumped when he felt a few soft smacks on the lower curve of his ass.

“…Then lift your hips.”

There was a brief beat before Akira complied, grabbing onto the bars of the headboard and burying his face against the sheets to hide his embarrassment.

With his eyes closed, he didn’t notice the second piece of silk sliding over his head until it was too late and Nano had already fastened the blindfold behind his eyes. Akira inhaled sharply, struggling against the restraints, but said nothing to object, as though he knew he couldn’t bare to watch what was going to be done to him anyway. Nor did he object when a firm pillow was slid beneath his hips to keep his ass raised while his body was teased open.

Seeing his lover trapped in such a vulnerable position, offering himself willingly despite the humiliation of what he surely knew was about to take place… drew out all of his predatory instincts. There was something very primal about it, and the images going through his head were growing increasingly graphic. Akira’s face was already flushed nearly as red as the silk that bound him just from being put into such a position, his cock already half hard again purely from anticipation. In the flickering candlelight, all of the curves of his body were illuminated, shadows falling into the dips and crevices of his pert round buttocks.

Nano leaned over him, biting gently at his earlobe, unable to resist the temptation to thrust between those pliant cheeks as he reached around front to pinch and tease his nipples.

“ _Mmmm_ …… _Nnnnn_ ……”

In truth, Nano would cherish Akira no matter what he looked like, but as it was, he relished the way those firm muscles tensed and contracted under his fair skin, highlighting even the smallest movements. He looked hard and soft at the same time, his ass both firm and seductively round.

Akira shifted involuntarily when his nipples were squeezed between cool, slender fingers, causing his back to arch and his buttocks to press back against the man kneeling behind him. Unable to resist the temptation, Nano bit down gently on Akira’s neck, and was rewarded with the bounce of those firm cheeks against his erection as the other squirmed in his grasp. Hunger rose, blending with lust. Nano drew back, leaving a trail of bite marks down Akira’s spine. By the time he got to his hips, Akira was trembling, his fair skin covered with marks, and it was taking all of his self-control not to simply grab his hips and thrust into him with no preparation whatsoever.

Nano opened the little bottle of lube as Akira had suggested and slicked up his fingers. Giving Akira’s ass a tight squeeze, he separated his buttocks to expose and stroke his tight entrance directly. Akira jumped, clenching instinctively, surprised by the sudden cold, slippery wetness between his cheeks. The little ring of muscle tightened at the sensation of his fingertips sliding over it, a natural defense against having one’s body invaded by another. He knew Akira still found the sensation strange, unnatural even, but he needed him to accept it. Akira bit his lip, breath coming faster just from being touched in such an intimate location.

As he stroked and teased soft circles, Nano felt the lubricant growing warmer, noting that it was a lot slicker than precum. It was so slippery that he found himself moving faster than usual, waiting only a few moments before pressing the tip of his finger inside urgently to start loosening that impossibly tight ring of muscle.

Akira continued to breathe hard, his body clenching defensively at even the slightest hint of invasion. To distract him from the discomfort, Nano moved the hand that had been kneading Akira’s plump ass down between his legs to stroke his cock. Despite the fact that he hadn’t been terribly aggressive yet, Akira’s skin was so fair that his cheeks were already developing a slight rosy glow.

Nano’s finger slid inside shockingly easily, despite the narrow walls pressing back against him from all sides as that little ring of muscle clamped down on him wantonly. Sliding it in and out was similarly smooth, and Nano began twisting and toying to try and loosen the passageway.

The sight of that pink ring of muscle as it continued to clench wantonly against his finger made Nano’s mouth water. He felt ravenous, almost as though he were starving. Withdrawing his fingers, he took hold of each cheek to spread them open, leaning in and licking up along the crease, unsubtle and deliberate.

As predicted, Akira’s initial reaction was violent, thrashing against the restraints, but Nano held his hips in place and continued firmly and insistently lapping at his entrance, teasing him open with his tongue. The pleasant taste of vanilla only made it more enticing.

“What are you…?!”

Nano saw no reason to answer that, since the answer was obvious, his fingers instead squeezing and digging into the pliant flesh of Akira’s ass. Akira’s breath caught in his throat, clenching his fists against the restraints as Nano’s tongue slipped inside of him, teasing soft circles around his tight entrance.

“Nikolai, _damn it_ … It won’t matter if you’re using lube if you lick it all off! Whoever the hell decided it was a good idea to make this stuff edible did not know _you_.”

“Don’t worry, Akira. I will use more.”

Even the feel of his breath against that pink ring of muscle as he spoke seemed to make Akira tremble. The desperate, choked cries that he was trying to hold back still escaped his lips unbidden, and he was probably only vaguely aware of the way he spread his legs and arched his back.

Nano refused to let up, barely phased by the way Akira’s breath came in pants, the way he squirmed in his grasp and clawed at the sheets. His tongue circled the rim before plunging back inside his body, deeper this time. Akira bit back a moan, struggling and failing to keep his voice down.

No matter how good it felt, no matter how quickly his body responded, no matter how hungry for Nano’s cock he was after, Akira could never seem to get used to this. And that, almost certainly, was what made it so effective.

Akira was too far gone to notice the soft buzzing over the sound of his own pleasured moans as he reluctantly succumbed to the forbidden pleasure and began to relax into it. It was only after Nano withdrew and he felt the strange vibration of the lubricated device pressed directly against his entrance, that he realized what his partner was doing. He let out a wordless scream, trying to scramble away, but his legs were already weak and trembling, and he could go nowhere restrained by red silk and Nano’s unrelenting embrace.

“Stop…  _ahhh_ …… It’s too much…… I…. _ahhhh_ ….”

Akira flailed, pulling wildly at the restraints, shaking, unable to escape as the tip of the slicked up vibrator pressed inside him, bit by bit.

“ _Nnnnn_ …… No, god… Please…  _ahhhh_ … Don’t put it inside… It won’t fit…”

Nano stroked Akira’s trembling skin soothingly, delighting in the buck of his hips and the way his ass bounced as he tried and failed to escape the strange device being slowly inserted between his plump, trembling cheeks with painfully slow precision.

“It will fit, Akira. You’ve taken so much of it already.”

“ _Ngggghh_ … _ahhhhh_ ……”

Akira tried to slide his legs back to lower his hips into a less obscene position, but with the pillow already under him, he only got so far before his back was arched even further under his own weight, lifting his buttocks into an even more vulnerable position from which there was no escape. The vibrator continued to push into him, over halfway to its fullest point. Now, with Akira’s hips already pressed against the pillow, there was no resistance. His aroused, uncontrolled hip motions now pushed back on the egg and only served to impale him faster. Even blindfolded, Akira hid his flushed face, trying to muffle his desperate moans and choked sobs. It was all he could do to utter a single desperate word.

“…Why…?”

“…Because I would rather see you cry out in pleasure than pain. And because in all our years together, I have never seen your body so receptive as this. You are so beautiful, Akira.”

“I… _haaa……_  I can’t take it…”

“You can. Please endure.”

A choked sob was his only response.

Nano once again spread Akira’s trembling cheeks with his free hand, running one finger gently around the pink ring of muscle muscle that was slowly but steadily expanding. He traced a bit more of the lube around that tight circle to ensure the passageway remained slick. It was already spread wide enough that Nano knew he could probably enter him without much pain, but he wanted to watch just a bit longer. Soon he would be able to take it all.

When the egg finally entered Akira’s body at its widest point, all of a sudden he swallowed it whole. Akira jumped, unable to stifle a desperate moan as the pink ring closed over it and Nano no longer had to hold it in place. The only evidence that it was there was the cord to the remote that still peeked out from between his cheeks. Akira thrashed against the sheets, crying out, legs moving in a desperate bid for traction as he pulled himself up, writhing like a wild animal in heat as his cock wept clear fluid onto the sheets.

For a moment Nano was so transfixed by the breathtaking vision before him that it was all he could do to grab the base of his own weeping cock and hold it tight to prevent himself from cumming just from watching. He realized with a start that he was trembling almost as intensely as Akira, his breath escaping in soft pants.

He couldn’t take it anymore. He needed him. _Now._  
  
With as much care as he could muster, Nano grabbed hold of the remote and pulled, gently but firmly, coaxing the ring of muscle to open from the inside. Fortunately, it came out much easier than it did going in, and before Akira could even react, Nano had already untied his restraints. Akira had the blindfold off nearly as fast, still gasping for breath as his lover aligned and prepared to enter him.

But before he could so much as get the tip in, Akira had turned, grabbing Nano’s throat and shoulder with sudden strength and throwing him back. Breathless, Nano found himself pressed back into the old pillows. The old bedsprings creaked as Akira’s shadow fell over him. His eyes were ravenous. At that moment, something deep inside him seemed to snap, crashing over his senses and draining all of the strength from his limbs. It didn’t even occur to him to resist, mind going utterly blank as Akira straddled him. His eyelids fluttered, gazing up through the hazy shadows at the man above him while all the rest of the world vanished from existence.

Akira grabbed Nano’s cock, aligning it with his shaking fingers so quickly and shamelessly that he had impaled himself fully and was moving before Nano had even fully processed what was happening. One hand reached up to grip Akira’s ass, while the other attended to his neglected cock.

“Harder.”

For a moment Nano wondered if he was hearing things. It was a command he had never once been given before.

“ _Harder_.”

Akira raked his nails down his chest, leaving angry red lines in his wake, arching his back as he rode him at a pace Nano had never even imagined possible.

“… _More._ ”

In the fading candlelight he could almost swear that Akira’s eyes were glowing. His movements were intense, deliberate, almost too much to handle. If he kept up this pace, he wouldn’t last long.

As though sensing his impending loss of control, Akira’s eyes focused, his grip tightening.

“Not yet.”

Nano’s breath caught in his throat. The words gripped him, and he felt compelled to heed, though he quickly doubted his ability when Akira bent down, kissing, biting, scraping… turning his mind to mush as reason and rationality dissipated, leaving behind nothing but pure primal lust.

Nano was lost in a sea of bliss, ravenously devouring every kiss, every stroke of his beloved’s tongue and fingertips. If only he could breathe his lover’s soul into his body to fill the once hollow emptiness inside until nothing else remained but him.

As Akira’s frenzied pace drew to a climax, Nano could feel his soul unraveling. He stroked faster, harder, until white rivulets shot over his flesh as his lover released himself onto his stomach and chest. Akira’s ass tightened around him, squeezing rhythmic contractions that quickly became too much to take. His moans disappeared down Akira’s throat as he came deep inside him and his body and soul were swamped with a blissful euphoric haze.

They lay tangled together, wordlessly clutching each other, breathless. In that dreamlike afterglow where their hearts beat in unison, it almost felt as though they truly had become one entity.

In the distance, over the sounds of their disheveled breathing, a tiny voice became increasingly audible. Glancing up, Nano saw Yume watching them from in the doorway. He wondered vaguely how long he had been sitting there, waiting for them to finish.

Kissing Akira’s forehead gently, he realized that Akira’s eyes were closed, his breath soft and rhythmic. Nano held him tight, giving him a soft kiss on his cheek.

“…Happy Valentine’s Day, Akira.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this! I hope you enjoyed it. My husband actually made the chocolates from this fic (quite professionally!) and I gave them out to my active readers/followers for White Day. I often try to make illustration cards and/or charms to go along with my fics as little gifts, too. We all need more NanoAki in our lives, right? So if you've been meaning to talk to me, please do so! I promise I don't bite (...though I can't speak for Nano). >:)


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